Sunday, July 16, 2017

Summer!

Since McKynlee was born, we have been so busy and have been trying to soak up as much of the summer as we can.  Tim and I both have time off of work for a few more weeks and we've been enjoying spending as much time with our girls as we can.

We celebrated Hadley turning one on the 17th of June.  We threw her a big Camo themed birthday party (you can thank her dad for that one).  We had a lot of family and friends come to celebrate with us and she was in her element.  She loved opening all her presents but she couldn't understand why we kept taking them away once she got them opened, haha.  It's so strange to think that my baby is 1 and that we have another baby.  It feels like we were bringing Hadley home from the hospital yesterday and here she is a year old already.










It's been so incredible watching her grow and seeing her personality shine.  She is so dang sweet and the happiest little girl you'll ever meet.  She's got some attitude though.  She knows what she wants and she's very vocal about expressing it, haha.  We have our work cut out for us as she gets older.  She's so smart though, it blows my mind.  We'll tell her, "Hadley, can you get such and such" and she knows exactly what we're talking about and she'll go get whatever it is.  Keys, her shoes, my phone.  She knows how to throw things in the trash can and we're working on teaching her how to pick up and put her toys away.  She loves to "help" me dust, vacuum, and sweep.  Whenever I ask the dogs if they have to go potty she runs down the hallway to the backdoor to let them outside.  It's so cute watching her try to do adult things.  We're working on getting her acclimated to using silverware but she eats pretty much anything and everything we eat.  She can say mom, dad, what's that, and doggie.  She's trying to mimic other things we say but so far it's not quite the word but pretty close so we know what she means for the most part.  She talks all the time but most of it's just baby babble.  She can clap, high five, give kisses and hugs, shut and open doors and cupboards, and she can flush the toilets.  It's amazing how much she has grown and developed.  





McKynlee is almost 8 weeks old and is growing so fast.  She already weighs 11 lbs 5 oz.  She is quite the opposite of Hadley.  She is much more fussy and constantly wants to be held.  She's been diagnosed with reflux and we have her on a liquid reflux medicine - she hates it and cries when we give it to her . . . three times a day.  She has something going on with her tummy because she would cry in pain after we would feed her and she would just constantly want to be eating.  We switched her to a soy formula and give her a little bit of rice in her formula to help with making her fuller.  It seems to help a little bit but she's still having trouble throughout the day.  Her pediatrician referred us to a pediatric GI specialist that we see tomorrow so we can hopefully get some answers to help her be more comfortable.  Seeing my baby in pain and not being able to help her is the worst feeling ever.  She does sleep through the night like her sister so we at least are getting some good rest.






We've been trying to spend as much time being active and outdoors as we can.  We took the girls to an outside concert, to my hometown for their annual Cherry Festival, we watched fireworks, we try to go walking but it's so hot that we have to go super early or it doesn't happen, and we've spent lots of time swimming.  Hadley loves the pool and water so much that we can't even keep her out of the dog's water bowl or the toilets, lol.  I'm glad that I have little water babies though.  It doesn't hurt my feelings one bit to take them swimming.










Wednesday, June 7, 2017

McKynlee Hope

She's finally here!!!!  We welcomed our sweet baby girl on May 24th at 8:56 am.  She weighed in at a whopping 9 lbs 8.4 oz and was 19.5 inches long.
Inudction night:  39 weeks

Tim and I went in the night of the 23rd for a scheduled induction.  Like our induction with Hadley, we got there about 8pm and got settled in our room for the night.  However, this time I opted for an oral medication vs. the gel that goes on the cervix.  The big difference is that I didn't have to be flat on my back to be monitored with an oral dose.  With Hadley's induction, I had to be monitored for an hour after the gel was placed but I had to lay flat on my back so the gel stayed in place.  It was miserable and the contractions were pretty intense right away.  With Cytotec, it simulated a more natural labor in that it took a bit longer to take effect and the contractions would be gradual.  I still had to be monitored for an hour after each dose, but I didn't have to be on my back for it.  

When we got to the hospital Kristi wanted to do a cervical exam to see if I had progressed and she also wanted to do a quick ultrasound to make sure that the baby hadn't turned.  The ultrasound showed the baby in the perfect position but, despite having daily contractions, my cervix hadn't changed for a few weeks.  I was still only 70% effaced and only dilated to 1 cm.  This made me a good candidate for an induction but Kristi still believed it would be about 20-25 hours of labor.  Shortly after she checked me, we got hooked up to the monitor.  They have a new monitor called the Monica that is a wireless monitor.  I personally believe it is way more obese friendly than regular monitors they have.  It's a bit touchy, but if properly placed it allows for freedom of movement and continuous monitoring.  Thankfully, our nurse was amazing and got it to work so I could move around as much as I wanted.  It made this induction so much easier and less stressful than Hadley's.  I can't even begin to describe how grateful I am that they had this technology for me to use.

I got my first dose of Cytotec at around 9pm and then I took an Ambian and went to bed around 11. I didn't feel any contractions with that first dose.  I was able to sleep and rest until the nurse came in at 3:30 to take my vitals and give me my second dose of Cytotec.  Still not feeling anything, I went back to sleep until 4am.  I woke up with pretty intense contractions so I got out of bed and walked around for a minute.  They were pretty uncomfortable so I woke up Tim and we called for the nurse to let her know.  My contractions gradually intensified and became increasingly uncomfortable so I asked the nurse to call my midwife at 6am.  I decided I wanted to get an epidural because with the contractions already being this intense I didn't think I could go another 20 hours of labor.  At this point, it had only been 2 hours since my second dose of Cytotec and the contractions were so intense I couldn't focus on anything other than each contraction.  Our nurse called Kristi and told her that I wanted an epidural and Kristi said that if I needed one to go ahead and call the anesthesiologist.  She was going to jump in the shower and she would be there within the hour.  I wanted to wait until she got there but I think I only made it another half hour before I told the nurse to call anesthesiology to have them give me the epidural.  They got there about 7am, maybe a little after, and were working on getting things set up when Kristi got there.  They gave me the epidural and it didn't take.  At all.  I got zero medicine.  The anesthesiologist wanted to wait a few minutes to see if it would take so he left to chart and came back about a half an hour later.  It was determined that they would try for a second time as the first try didn't take.  At this point, I'm in a lot of pain and I just want the damn epidural.  I'm alternating from walking around the room, leaning on the bed, sitting on the birthing ball, or sitting on the bed while all of this is happening.  Anything to relieve the pain.  

I started to freak out a bit, I kept saying "I can't do this" over and over again until my midwife got in my face and bluntly said "You don't have a choice.  You have to do this so breathe."  It was like having cold water thrown in my face, but in a good way.  She helped me to relax and breathe through each contraction while the anesthesiologist got everything set back up for the second epidural.  She had me sit on the bed in a different position so he could have access to my back.  While sitting there, I had this overwhelming feeling that I had to push.  It's so hard to describe what that felt like, but I didn't have time to register the thought "I need to push", my body just started to do it on it's own.  I'm not sure that'll even make sense.  I started hollering at Kristi, as they are putting in the new epidural, that I needed to push the baby out right now.  That I was pushing.  Kristi told me to just do what felt right and she asked me if I wanted to have them stop so she could check me yet.  I told her no and I just kept breathing and pushing.  As soon as they got the epidural in, I rolled over onto my side and kept pushing.  They got me onto my back and Kristi checked me and sure enough, I was dilated to a 10 and she could touch the baby's head.  

We had no idea I was that far along.  We're talking an induction, 4 hours of labor so far, and my water hadn't even broke yet.  Kristi said she's never seen an induction move that quickly - especially since my water hadn't even broke yet.  I kept pushing but at this point, I was so numb from the epidural that I couldn't feel my contractions or the baby crowning.  I had no idea if I was even pushing hard enough.  Kristi walked me through it and they turned off the medicine for the epidural so the numbness could wear off.  Kristi also broke my water as she believed it would help me feel the baby/pressure more.  It worked and after only 30 minutes of pushing, my sweet baby was earth side.  Tim caught her and put her on my belly, just like with Hadley.  McKynlee didn't cry at first so I panicked a bit but as soon as the nurses started wiping her off she started to cry.  She had the sweetest, quietest cry that I've ever heard.  She didn't want to open her eyes for anything.  (I actually worried that she was so fat she couldn't open them, haha.  She even had a nose wrinkle!)  She finally popped them open and it was the most beautiful moment when she looked at me.  I'm thankful that labor and delivery went so smoothly.  A total of 4.5 hours of active labor from start to delivery.  McKynlee was a little bruised but she had no problems otherwise and was born without any complications to herself. 

 



After the delivery however, we did have a few complications.  My uterus wouldn't contract so I started to hemorrhage.  My midwife had to pack me with gauze while she tried to manually contract my uterus.  Something that makes me eternally grateful I ended up getting an epidural as it requires her to place one hand on the inside of my uterus and one hand on the outside of my belly and simulate contractions.  I didn't feel it but it would have been incredibly painful otherwise.  As it is, I was left with bruises and soreness for days afterword.  She also gave me all the medications at her disposal to get my uterus to contract - four different kinds I believe.  I got a shot in each leg and medication in my IV.  It took her a couple of hours after delivery of her working on me to get the bleeding under control.  She even kept me on a slow drip of Pitocin for another 24 hours to make sure my uterus kept contracting so I didn't start bleeding again.  I also had a second degree tear that she had to stitch up in that time frame as well.  Way less severe than the tearing I had with Hadley.  

Because of my diabetes, one of the very first things they check on my babies is their blood sugar levels.  Babies born to diabetic mothers can struggle with their blood sugars being either too low or too high - especially the bigger the baby.  Sure enough, McKynlee had lower blood sugars so the staff became very concerned with getting her immediate food.  She was very lethargic and not very responsive for those first 24 hours while we worked on getting her sugars up.  They wanted to test 2 hours after every meal to see if she could maintain her blood sugar level and they had to be higher than a 45 for three consecutive pokes.  If she failed one, then we had to start the three pokes over again.  She kept failing.  We decided to supplement with formula to help her raise her blood sugar levels.  With the added formula and breast milk, we finally saw a rise in her blood sugars and she finally passed all three pokes and we were able to bring her home that Friday.  Luckily, her blood sugars weren't too much off the mark when she did fail otherwise she could have went to NICU.  We also were very proactive in getting her the volume she needed so we saw an almost immediate rise in her sugars once we gave her formula.  The only downside is that she wouldn't latch onto the breast after the bottle.  She's still getting breast milk, but now I have to pump it for her and give it to her in a bottle.  

Thankfully, everyone is doing fantastic at this point.  MyKynlee is two weeks old today and very vocal about her food.  She's quite the chunk and is already weighing in at 9 lbs 12 oz, 4 ounces over her birth weight.  She's also wearing 0-3 month clothes and a size 1 diaper.  She almost completely skipped the newborn stage.  My recovery is going great as well.  I really couldn't tell that I delivered an almost 10 pound baby.  I did encapsulate my placenta again and I think that is the main reason why my recovery has been so amazing.   

Hadley is incredible and has taken to being a big sister like it's second nature.  She loves to touch her baby and give her kisses and hugs.  Sometimes a little too forcefully so we have to watch her like a hawk, haha.  Having two babies, especially in under a year, has been a bit of an adjustment.  It gets a bit hectic when they are both hungry at the same time or when I'm feeding McKynlee and Hadley wants to be held.  Tim was able to take some time off and having him home as been such a blessing.  We're slowly adjusting and figuring out how to multitask with two instead of one.  It's a kind of chaos that I can't help but love.

 



1st family photo

1 day old

2 weeks old

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Baby Countdown!

Just like Hadley, we only get to see from nose down
I’m counting down the days until she’s here!  This pregnancy has been a rough one and I’m the most miserable I have ever been.  In fact, at my last week’s appointment my midwife decided to do a cervical check to make sure everything is okay.  Turns out that the baby is already super low and in position – hence the discomfort.  I’m 1 cm dilated, 70% effaced, and already having contractions.  Nothing super intense, just enough to make me uncomfortable.  However, it has been making my regular life difficult especially since I have a 10-month-old who is walking EVERYWHERE.  Tim has really picked up my slack though and he takes care of most everything at this point.  My midwife doesn’t seem to think this baby is going to wait until 40 weeks to make her appearance.

She looks so much like Hadley did
We also had an ultrasound yesterday to check on the baby’s size.  She’s considerably bigger than Hadley was.  At 36 weeks, Hadley measured 5lbs 14oz.  This little girl is already measuring at 7lbs 7oz.  I had a feeling she was going to be bigger so I wasn’t too surprised by those numbers.  My doctor was still pretty happy with my blood sugars.  My numbers have been great, my A1C came back as a 5.3 (which are non-diabetic numbers), and my amniotic fluid was normal which is another indicator that my diabetes has been controlled well.  However, this baby is still big so he thinks it would be best to induce at 39 weeks vs. waiting.  I’m hoping she comes on her own before then because I don’t want to induce again if I can help it.  I will say, if it’s induction vs a 10-lb baby, I’ll take the induction. 

My blood pressure seems to be on the rise the last couple of weeks.  I ended up getting induced with Hadley so my midwife and doctor are concerned that it’ll just keep getting higher.  They have ordered restricted activity from here until the baby comes.  No more walking, standing, carting stuff around, they don’t want me to walk around Costco.  I’m ordered to keep my feet up as much as possible and only light daily activity.  It’s not bed rest, but not far off.  They are wanting to make sure to get ahead of this so it doesn’t turn into preeclampsia. 

I do have some good news!  I’m GBS negative this time so that means I don’t have to be on antibiotics during labor and I won’t have to be monitored as much.  Yay!!!  I have gained around 40 pounds this pregnancy - I swear all in my belly.  I keep freaking out every time I go to the doctor because the scale just keeps going up.  They laugh at me and say that it’s normal to gain weight during pregnancy but I can’t figure out why I’ve gained so much especially since I lost 36 pounds with Hadley.  I’ll be interested in seeing how much comes off after I deliver. 


The next 3(ish) weeks promise to be interesting.  I’m really hoping she decides to come a little early but if not, we’ll have a baby in 3 weeks.  I’ll opt for an induction at 39 weeks if she hasn’t come on her own by then.  Being diabetic, there are way more risks during delivery if the baby is larger.  I’m not willing to risk it.  I guess we'd better get on the stick and pick a name for this kid since she'll be here sooner rather than later!  

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

10 Month Update

Easter 2017

My little lady!  It's my favorite when she crosses her legs 

This is the only way I can get my bump in the picture without a mirror.  33 1/2 weeks!


I now have a 10 month old!  Man, how time flies.  It seriously feels like I gave birth to her yesterday and here I am, six weeks from birthing our second daughter and I have 10 month old.  What the heck is going on in my life????!!!

I laugh at myself when I look back and think about how na├»ve my thinking was when it came to pregnancy/birth/child rearing.  I had no clue what I was getting into and no amount of anyone telling me was going to come close to preparing me for reality.  We’ve done the all-nighters, the sickies, the vomit/poop parties, teething and all the pretty standard stuff that people think about when it comes to parenting.  We’ve also got to experience things we would never have thought about – like finding a car seat that would actually fit in my car behind the front seats.  We put Hadley’s car seat in the middle because it wouldn’t fit but now that we need to add another car seat to the mix we’ve had to improvise.  Who thinks of things like this before they have kids???  We sure didn’t.  Heck, we didn’t even measure Hadley’s car seat before we just bought one. 

It’s been an incredible, albeit frustrating at times, journey so far.  We just took Hadley in for a checkup and she’s measuring at a 1 year old level developmentally.  She has 8 teeth and more coming in, she started walking and standing up on her own (not pulling herself up) at 9 months, she can clap and high five, gives the sweetest kisses, drinks out of a sippy cup and a straw, and has the most amazing laugh.  Hadley has a mind of her own and there is no making her do anything she doesn’t want to.  She weaned herself off her binky, pureed baby food, and now she’s weaning herself off her bottle.  She will eat anything and everything in sight.  In fact, it wasn’t until we started daycare a few weeks ago that we realized just how capable she is of feeding herself.  We may have been a little bit over protective and I wouldn’t let her eat a ton of solid foods.  It wasn’t until she started refusing baby food and her bottle that I was forced to start feeding her solid food.  Since starting daycare, she’s thrived and now eats solid food on the regular.  She was way ready before I was.

I thought we would have more time to adjust to feeding an extra body regular food.  Leave it to Hadley to prove me wrong.  It’s a whole different ball game when you are 100% responsible for what goes in someone else’s mouth.  I have to make sure she’s getting the proper nutrients and getting of what she needs to grow.  It’s a bit daunting at times.  She also wants whatever mom and dad eat so I am forced to be conscientious of what I eat.  At times, it’s been daunting.  Especially when I’m tired and I don’t feel like cooking or cleaning up.  It’s way too easy to slip back in the routine of stopping somewhere and getting something.  However, if I do that I either get something for Hadley or she goes without any solid food.  I refuse to feed her crappy fast food and a bottle just isn’t enough to satisfy her anymore.  We eat at home now.

Thinking about all this long term is kind of scary.  My number one goal when I found out I was pregnant with Hadley was to make sure that she had a different relationship with food than I did.  Right now, it’s going well.  She tells us when she’s hungry and when she’s had enough she pushes her food/bottle away and stops eating.  Somewhere along the way I have lost that and I don’t want to take that away from her.  We let her eat when she wants and how much she wants.  We just offer her the leftovers later if she gets hungry again.  Tim and I both want to make sure that she knows the difference between healthy and unhealthy.  However, I also give her macaroni and cheese and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.  She doesn’t get it regularly or every day and she usually gets it with a vegetable and/or fruit.  I guess my point is, I want my children to grow up with a balanced relationship with food.  I want them to experience and enjoy it all but to also know what the word moderation means. 

Hadley is just learning to eat and appreciate the wide varieties of food.  What we teach her now will create the relationship she’ll have with food for the rest of her life.  It’s daunting, at times, knowing that I’m responsible for that when I have my own food struggles.  It makes me want to do better for her and the child coming.        

Friday, February 3, 2017

#TreeOfLife

This is kind of an in between post and doesn't really have anything to do with weight loss.  I'm excited because I finally sat down and figured out how to create the Picsart #treeoflife photo and I wanted to share mine!  I think it became a big thing because it was meant to make people aware of breastfeeding.  I myself didn't have a long breastfeeding journey.  From the beginning, I struggled with Hadley to get her to latch and eventually ended up exclusively pumping for her for four months before my supply diminished.

I struggled for the first month to nurse Hadley before I had to go back to work and we switched to bottles.  Once she started taking a bottle we didn't nurse as often and I eventually just started pumping.  Because of this, I have two or three photos in total of me nursing her.  I'm thankful that I have those because it's empowering to look back at them and know that I tried to do that for her.  Amidst the struggle, we did have some incredible successes.  It's awesome knowing that I provided her with the nutrients she needed and I gave her the best start in life that I could.  I wanted to do something to commemorate so I created the following photos from Picsart.  I couldn't decide which I liked better so I posted both.


Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Is Winter Over Yet?

I’m not usually the biggest fan of Winter because I hate driving around when the roads are icy and snowy.  I love everything else about it, however.  The way the entire landscape changes and the cool temperatures.  I was really excited for this Winter especially because it would be Hadley’s first snow.  And boy did it snow.  We got more snow this year than we had for over 30 years!  Everyone was calling it record breaking – schools closed, garbage trucks couldn’t get into subdivisions to pick up trash, mail wasn’t being delivered, and stores were sold out of everything because power kept going out.  It was utter chaos and driving around in it has been hellacious.  God definitely made it special for Hadley – holy cow.  Apparently, there is another winter storm coming our way and we’re supposed to get another 6 inches of snow by Friday.  I just want to cry every time I hear the words “more snow”.      

Some good things have happened this winter though.  With all the cold and yuck, we haven’t been tempted to eat out so we’ve been planning and eating all our meals at home.  YAY!  My sweet girl is 7 months old and she can say Ma (usually at the top of her lungs when she’s pissed), she has two teeth, she’s happily eating solids along with her formula, she’s rolling around like crazy and is almost ready to crawl, and she can pull herself up by grabbing on to the side of something.  Once that girl can crawl/walk we are in some serious trouble.  Her favorite things to play with are the surround sound speaker cords and the cord to her swing.  We’ve celebrated some big milestones with Hadley this Winter which has put a brighter perspective on the whole situation. 

We’ve also celebrated some new things with baby girl number 2.  We’re now 23 weeks along and baby is super healthy and growing just like she should.  I’ve been doing all the same things I had with Hadley but this pregnancy has been markedly different.  I’ve gained weight with this pregnancy when I didn’t with Hadley.  I’m now up to around 295.  I complained so much about it at all my prenatal appointments my midwife had to explain that women normally gain weight during pregnancy.  Luckily, I haven’t put on anything else in the last few weeks.  I started showing earlier and I felt the baby move way sooner – which was awesome.  I have a posterior placenta this time around so the movements alone have been so much different.  My diabetes and sugars have been well controlled and it shows in the size of the baby.  If everything is good there and she is healthy, I’m not too worried about weight gain – if it doesn’t keep going up.  I’m trying so hard to keep myself away from 300, in a healthy non-dieting way while I’m pregnant.  It’s not a number I ever want to see again.


Aside from those things, I’ve been giving considerable thought to becoming a stay a home mom.  Right now, my mom has been watching Hadley for us while Tim and I work which has been such a huge blessing.  I’ve loved not having to put her in daycare and she loves spending time with her Grandma.  But, I’m having a harder and harder time leaving the house to go work when my girl is at home.  With the new baby coming I have been struggling with the thought of going back to work.  The problem we have is that it takes two incomes for us to pay our bills.  I don’t know how long my mom is going to be able to watch both girls, especially since they just bought a house farther away from us.  I’m trying to come up with some options that would allow me to work from home and set my own schedule.  So far, I haven’t come up with a solution.  Hopefully something will happen soon but until then we are just living day by day.