Monday, February 2, 2015

What's Different This Time Around?

There are so many differences this time around compared to when I started HCG.  The first and foremost change is that I'm not weighing myself.  I know when I decided to start over I was weighing in around 330lbs.  That's a weight gain of all the weight I lost plus four pounds.  Ugh.  The point is, I wanted I starting weight so I could keep track of my weight.  This time, I didn't want to make my focus about losing weight.  That didn't work for me before, and in fact, I just ended getting so upset with myself if I wasn't losing fast enough that I would binge eat.  Not very effective at all.

This time around, the scale is under the bathroom cupboard and that's where it stays.  I have absolutely no idea if what I've been doing is effective or not.  I don't know if I've lost weight and I really don't care.  I want to keep track monthly just to make sure I'm on the right track but that's the end of it. 

For a brief, brief moment I joined a weight watchers group at work.  I think the concept of WW is wonderful, and if that's what works for you then that is awesome.  I hated every minute of it.  I found that every week during weigh in I was dreading what the scale said.  It didn't matter if I had ate super clean and healthy the whole week or if I had worked out for three hours every day - if that scale didn't show a drop the WW leader was all over me about it.  HEAVEN FORBID if I had actually gained.  I know she was probably trying to be supportive but that just didn't work for me.  I was more depressed when I decided to quit than when I started.  So - no scale.   

Secondly, my main goal this time around is to cook every meal at home.  I know that seems like a no brainer but in all reality - that's super hard for me.  I work long hours and when I add gym time to it some days the last thing I want to do is come home and cook.  I've been doing it anyway.  And I've made some freaking delicious meals. 

Sometimes I honestly don't know what I'm doing.  I worry that I'm not getting enough fruits or veggies or that I'm lacking in protein.  Then there's that fiber stuff - am I supposed to be worrying about that?  Yeah, I've got no freaking clue.  What I do know, is that I'm eating low carb and low fat.  And I'm doing a lot of research in between!  Also, my crock-pot has become my best friend.  I can't tell you how much I love cooking in that sucker - especially on my really long days!  Coming home to dinner already made is such a blessing, haha.  And usually the prep time in the morning isn't too bad. 

Simple things, but I'm finding that they've been really effective so far.  I've stuck to my plan and we've become regulars at our gym.  I've even started to meet new people.  This week, we are trying out morning workouts versus going at night after work.  Five A.M. sure comes early so we'll see how well that goes.  Right now, it's basically about trial and error.

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